The Power of Positive Emails

I am not a fan of Mondays.

I am in at work even earlier than normal in order to combat the frazzled feeling I will get coming back from the weekend and not feeling prepared.

Even when I get into work early, I still end up feeling a little frazzled somehow. Today was no different with my students being just as frazzled as I was.

Normally, at the end of Mondays, I just sit at my desk for a few minutes and go on Imgur, Facebook, something mindless.

Today I decided to do something different. I decided to make a student and parent's Monday.

There is a sophomore that I had last year as a freshmen. Bright kid just very forgetful and unorganized. They would constantly have missing assignments or work turned in late which frustrated their parents to no end.

I have them again this year and it is a complete turn around. There are no missing or late assignments and it is obvious tests and quizzes have been studied for. The student is currently earning an "A-"

I decided to email their parents, while cc'ing the student, informing them that I am very proud of their child. The repsonse back was immediate and happy:

Thank you so much!  It is wonderful to hear!

You made our Monday!



Yes, my school has live grading so yes, my parents can easily log in to see how their child is doing. I could have easily assumed that the parents are doing this. For all I know, they are and are fully aware of their child's grade. However, just this little email validated what they see. It made what otherwise is a crappy day by default into something to smile about.

Now, with 120 students, there is no way I can constantly do this. The time it would take me to compose a "happy" email for each student a week would be insane. However, I'm totally for this when a teacher sees something extraordinary. It reminds me of the Taylor Mali poem "What Teachers Make"* and the line where he says:

"I make parents see their children for who they are/
And who they can be"

I knew what this child could be. I've known since last year. Yeah, a grade can tell the parents what their child could be but by sending that one, small, little email, I am able to make them see who their child is not just a number in the gradebook.

It is why I teach. It is why I love my job even on Mondays and even when I complain.

I wouldn't trade it for the world.


*If you have never heard this poem, below is a drawing of it done by Zen Pencils and also a video of the poem performed by Taylor Mali himself

#devolson

The school year has started which means it is time to start blogging again*

Here is why I never ask my students what they did over the summer because this would be my response:

I taught summer school. When I wasn't teaching summer school I was reading a book and drinking wine.

Not that exciting.

But now we are into the school year and specifically that time of year known as DEVOLSON** which stands for The Dark, Evil Vortex of Late September, October, and November which is to explain that early burnt out, tired feeling you get during this time of year because you have yet to settled into the routine of school and the transition into that routine usually takes the the first three months of school. This feeling tends to lead you to slightly lose your mind.

Although I did not invent this title, I am here to say this is real.

For example, this was an actual Facebook status I posted:

How To Start Your Thursday Morning:
1) Wake up from a dream where the secretary responsible for sub plans was yelling at you for not submitting sub plans and missing school.
2) Look at your clock and realize that was your subconscious telling you that you had over slept your alarms and that it is 6:20 and you have to be at work by 7:30
3) See a text from your roommate asking for you to wake them up so they could move their car
4) Throw markers at your roommate to wake them up
5) Struggle to find your ID and eventually find it right where you left it the night before
6) Rush out the door all ready to call the office saying you're going to be late only to realize that since you rushed through getting ready and were able to hit all the lights at green, it is actually 6:50 in the morning.
7) You go in and get a cup of coffee and breathe
This guide is brought to you by a full time teacher in graduate school

That was my actual morning. Besides reading the list Love, Teach gives to survive this, I present you with my method.

Four Ways to Survive DEVOLSON According to Dailyish Teacher

1. Limit your wine drinking to only one glass. Seriously. You'll want to drink a lot. Don't go overboard. It will make it worse
   
2. Create a "Happy File." Since I limit my wine drinking, I need another way to feel happy. I do this with my "Happy File" which is a collection of student sticky notes, sayings from my daily calendar that I have saved, emails from parents I have printed out, and even the drawings students give me (Yes....high school students still draw their teachers pictures especially when they get bored during a test)
   
3. Keep pictures of someone you don't hate on your desk at work. Boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband/best friend etc. Pick the person you tend to complain to because they make you feel sane again. Just looking at their picture will make you feel better
   
4. Laugh. Laugh a lot. This is the most important one. This is the one that helps the most. This is why I keep my desktop background rotating between images I find amusing.I also post some of my favorites on my bulletin board next to my desk so I can just turn my head and laugh when I need it. 

Since I can't really help you with 1 - 3, I figured I would give you a jump start on 4 with some things to laugh about.

This is students in a nutshell

*If you notice I only blog when I want to avoid grading. This is the best type of blogging. It allows me to feel productive while

** I did not create this term. The lovely Love, Teach did. She is hilarious. You should read her blog. She is much better/experienced then me at this. She even writes for WeTeachers and has a bingo game you can play

10 Problems Only Teachers Will Understand

Being a teacher is classified as a "white collar" job. Somethings are the same; we have contracts like most other professions and have assigned hours we have to be at work. We also have to have meetings and do reports.

However, our days are super unique in that there are a lot of events and problems that other "white collar" jobs, specifically those that occur in an office, will never understand.

I am lucky in the sense that two of my best friends are teachers so when I complain about this stuff, they understand me and can relate. When I complain to my boyfriend, he kind of stares at me bewildered that these things happen. 

I do apologize if this is pretty high school specific. Although, many elementary teachers will be able to relate to the majority of them.

10 Problems Only Teachers Will Understand

1. Finished reading directions out loud in class. "Does anyone have any questions?" ~teacher "Yeah, I don't understand." ~student "Okay, what don't you understand?" ~teacher "All of it. What are we doing again?" ~student
   
   
   
   
2. Read out loud in class: "In what vile part of this anatomy / Doth my name lodge?" (Romeo and Juliet III.iii) "What does Romeo literally ask for the location of?" ~teacher ::silence:: ~students
   
   
   
   
3. "What do you mean it doesn't make sense? I made sure I used big words so that it would make sense." ~ student "Do you know the definition of the word you used?" ~teacher "No. But why does that matter? It is a smart word" ~student
   
   
   
   
4. The constant murmur of students talking while you're trying to explain directions
   
   
   
   
5. Day after turning in essay: "Did you grade my essay yet?" ~student
   
   
   
   
6. "I don't get it!" ~student "Did you read the directions?" ~teacher "No. But it is still confusing!" ~student
   
   
   
   
   
7. Parent sends an email during 1st period while you are teaching. Check your email the first chance you get three periods later: you have three follow up emails demanding to know why you haven't answered yet
   
   
   
   
8. "My son is smart! Why are you failing him?" ~ parent "He hasn't turned in any assignments or his paper." ~teacher "So? Why is that stuff even important?" ~ parent
   
   
   
   
   
9. "What do you mean you can't go to Taco Tuesday because you have to grade? Don't you get off work at 3pm? Why would you have to do work after you're done with work" ~"friends"
   
   

   

   My actual response to that text message

   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
10. Reviews with class. Offers to stay early and late for help. Constantly asks if the students understand. Class average on test: 65%
    
    

Despite all of this, I still love my job. I must be crazy

Survival of 3rd Quarter Slump

Ah, the end of the 3rd quarter has happened. For those of you that teach high school (maybe middle school as well), you know that grades drop significantly during this quarter. The underclassmen assume that they have life figured out, so they start to slack off. The juniors have started to get too preoccupied with prom and the seniors have started to stop caring (the real challenge comes to get seniors to do ANYTHING during 4th quarter).

Due to all of this, the grades of most students drop a letter grade if not more. This then causes parents to freak out and email you over, and over, and over, and over asking for grade changes. It also causes students BEGGING for extra credit.

How do you survive this? I have a few suggestions for you.

• Pretend you have become completely computer illiterate and you don't know how to access your email until a week after the 4th quarter starts. "Oh, I'm sorry. I had temporary amnesia and couldn't remember how to log into my email." I'm sure the parents will understand
    
• Smile anytime any student says something to you. Just smile. Don't speak. Just smile. The students will be driven away by your creepiness.
   
  
     

• Respond to any email with condescending Wonka. This is my personal favorite option.
  
   
     
• Throw your computer out the window. You know, because if you don't have a computer, you can't answer any emails. It is a fool proof excuse.
     
• Remember that you're supposed to be a professional and keep your cool even though it is super annoying that the students only care about their grades now. This is obviously the only logical option. Which is why the douchebag student meme should help. Yes, I know I've used this before but when it helps, it helps.
  
  

7 Painfully Accurate High School Teacher Hashtags

So this awesome Buzzfeed post is titled "24 Painfully Accurate Teacher Hashtags" and like most things, it is directed mostly at elementary teachers (or so I hope because I pray no high school teacher would use #WhyIsThisSticky because I'm pretty sure if you are saying this to high school students, it isn't the same type of "sticky".....).

There is nothing wrong with this since I'm all for elementary teachers because, well, they are teachers but, I would like to make it more geared towards high school teachers, although some could apply across the board. So, to replace the seven (numbers 2, 3, 4, 12, 14, 17, 23) that are geared towards elementary school, I present to you:

7 Painfully Accurate High School Teacher Hashtags

1. #PaperGrading #DidYouReallyWriteThat
   
   

   

   Pearls Before Swine

   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
2. #ExtraCredit #DoYourWork
   
   
   
3. #Listen #GetOffTwitter
   
   
4. #Parents #ScreamsInside
   
   
   
5. #Senoritis #BeMoreThanABlob
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
6. #LastDayOfQuarter #OhNowYouCare
   
   
   
7. #BangsHeadOnDesk #Cries
   
   

I Don't Want to Grade Papers So I'm Sharing Things With You

I realllllllllllllllly don't want to grade my freshmen essays.

You benefit though.

I put up a bunch of my resources for teaching thesis essay writing. You can find them all here.

You can see the other resources I have provided at the menu bar above or by going here. My resources are constantly(ish) being updated so check back every once and a while to find new goodies.

Hope this makes your life easier!

Also, I hope this makes you smile

Laughing Instead of Going Crazy

Curiosity of Stephen Patis andPeals Before Swine

It has been a very looooong day at school and my last period planning took forever to get here.

Why was it so long you ask?

Besides the fact that my students seemed to have ingested pounds of sugar, I was grading essays during my spare minutes. The above comic pretty much sums up how I feel after grading some of these essays. Nearly every essay I want to write various comments like Cameron Diaz does in Bad Teacher. If you have never seen that movie, I have put the video of her grading short answers below (language NSFW since she drops the f-bomb once). It pretty much sums up how every teacher feels while grading. The first time I saw that scene I couldn't stop laughing for a good 5 minutes so I missed the next scene and had to rewind.

Basically, the point of this post is to give you some laughs since you're most likely on the verge of losing it and going crazy. Hopefully they help.

(Since I am an English teacher, I will say that I have not created any of these images/videos. If I know the author I will give them credit but some were just circulated on the internet so much that I'm not sure who the original author is)